Out of the Darkness

This past weekend I walked in the Out of the Darkness walk. It occurs yearly in numerous states, and help to raise awareness for suicide prevention.
As I’ve mentioned in a previous post I lost my dad to suicide six years ago.
It took a very long time for me to work through my anger, and my questions of “why”.
It’s taken even longer for me to be able to openly talk about it, without those feelings rising up again.
I was somewhat nervous the morning of the walk, mainly because I didn’t know what to expect.

At the walk, they gave you beaded necklaces representing losing someone in your life.
Then, before the walk they took the time to recognize each of the different groups, by having people raise their necklaces.
It was eye opening, in a way, to see all the gold necklaces to up, which was showing they lost a parent.

I have been blessed with an awesome family-in-law,  and walked with my sister in law, brother in law, their kids, and of course Jordan and our boys. Although it took 2 hours (not kidding) to walk 3 miles with the 6 kids in tow, it was great to be supporting a cause.
I wanted to thank everyone who donated to help me reach my goal of raising $200 for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.

Also, to anyone who has lost someone close to them to suicide, I want you to know that you’ll get through it. It might take awhile, it might take working through anger, and fighting off tears… but sooner than you think you’ll be able to laugh again at the “remember when…” stories, and the times you remember will be the good times.


3 thoughts on “Out of the Darkness

  1. Danielle says:

    I’m so glad your walk went well and that you had so much support. I’ll be doing my first walk later this month. I lost my father to suicide almost 11 years ago and I too took a long time to work through the feelings and to be able to speak openly. Did you tell your kids how your father died? I’m feeling uncertain about telling my oldest (almost 7) why I am walking.


    • carlyjoycurtis says:

      That’s great that you’re doing a walk! It was comforting being surrounded by other walkers who have had similar experiences. I talked with the older two (3, and 5) explaining that we were going to walk in memory of Grandpa Charlie. They asked where he was, and I said that his brain was sick, and he died. They talked about him being with God, and then dropped the conversation. I’m sure as they get older, and ask more questions, the chance will arise to explain more… for myself, and for you.


      • Danielle says:

        Thanks for replying. My oldest is just about to turn 7 and can read well so I’ve decided not to tell him exactly what’s going on or have my family come. The most in-depth we’ve gotten into how my dad died is that he had a sickness and the medicines didn’t work for him. It was hard enough for me to decide to walk so I think I’ll save the conversation about “what is suicide?” for another time. I think it’s one of the most difficult things about it all for me. He knows I’m going to walk to raise money to help people who have the sickness my dad had.


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