Be a light…

My dad made a choice that would ultimately affect his friends, and family for the  rest of their lives.  Many question will never be answered.  Six years ago, I lost my dad to suicide.  I remember the exact moment I got the phone call. I was on a trip with my husbands family, celebrating. Celebrating one of his brothers graduation from a part of the Navy, and a birthday. Being newlyweds, it was my first time meeting them all.

dad

I remember answering the phone, hearing the news, and I couldn’t breathe. I dropped the phone and fell to the ground. Thankfully, my husband had come outside with me, and helped me through it. He helped me book the ticket back home. He helped me at the funeral. He has helped me cope, to get through the anger, confusion, disappointment, and has pointed me to the cross.

God has a plan, it’s just not always our plan.

I have been able to let go of the anger, and the hurt. I still have sad days. Having him miss out on seeing and knowing my three boys is hard. Having him miss out on the other two grandsons, is hard.  Watching my sister get married, was very exciting, but also hard. He’s missing out on our lives, because of ending his own.

dad2

I find it so important to help get awareness out there. My sister does an “Out of the Darkness” walk every year. Her link is here:
http://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.participant&participantID=588766

I’m doing the walk in Oregon, my link is here:
http://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.participant&participantID=590201

Lets help raise awareness.  Lets make resources available to help someone. Lets be the light in the dark world.

*In memory of Charlie Shultz*

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